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I had taken to drinking alone every night and only looked forward to going to work. ‘You didn’t do what I suggested?’ Vicki said one day. ‘I go to court in a couple of days.’ I said ‘Do you want me to come with you?’ She asked. ‘I’ll be fine,’ I said. On court day Barry gave me the house and offered a generous amount of money for the videotape. I gave him the tape but made sure I had a copy in case he tried to pull something. I went straight home with my bottle of wine to celebrate. I was lying on the floor drunk when the doorbell rang. I stumbled to the door and threw it open. ‘Hello Mrs. Robinson,’ Johnny said with a smile. I just walked away from the door and fell on the couch and rolled on to the floor. He closed the door behind him and looked around the room. ‘What happened?’ He asked as I rolled around on the floor trying to get up. ‘My life just like this house is a mess,’ I laughed. I went to sleep before he could ask me another question. I woke up around five in the evening. I have dreams, you know? I have dreams where noses with wings take careof rose orchards where the juice of the sweet, succulent roses turns boysinto girls, when I can be me for the rest of my life, all thanks to afeathery nose. I have dreams where surrealism is so obvious that that word no longer hasa name. Where my own hair leaps from my knees, the Hellish blizzard ofstubble dissipates from my chin at last, allowing sculpted smoothness tobe, not smoothless.It actually is easier for me to write when I can?t see how stupid itlooks. I am a girl. With a penis. I?m a six foot tall girl with apenis and no breasts where there should be breasts, DAMN I want breasts. I?d feel normal, you know? All those catty girls I read about in the"MOST EMBARASSING" sections of magazines and their stupid petty stories. 'Oh no my crush saw my thong' 'Oh no, my crush heard me burp.'Well, try 'Oh no, my crush saw my seven inch erection.' But you don'thave to deal with that. Being a girl sucks. But,.
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