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. if you... if you..."Janie turned onto her side, facing Tim. "What is it Tim? What's wrong?" Well... if things don't... aw shit," Tim, just say it. It's ok, tell me."Tim drew a deep breath. "Janie, I'd like... I want... you to come live with me." He sighed.Janie was taken aback. "Oh Tim, that is so sweet. It's just like you to offer that." Will you? Move in with me?" Tim, listen to me; I'm so very flattered that you'd invite me to live with you, but there are many things to consider. First, there's my divorce coming up. Things would not go well for me before a judge if I was living with another man. Hank could use that against me. And I know what you are thinking, that I'm already living with another man, Joel. But I know if you can keep Joel's and my secret that no accusations of impropriety can be brought against me. Yeah, if anyone knew that we'd been sleeping together in an incestuous relationship Joel and I both would be ruined in this town."Tim nodded in agreement. Janie had. ”“But I’m a Harvard graduate,” the young man replied indignantly.“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know that,” said the manager. “Here, give me the broom I’ll show you how it works.”Drunk in France-true eventThis actually happened to an Englishman, in France, who was totally drunk.A French policeman stops the Englishman’s car and asks if he has been drinking.With great difficulty, the Englishman admits that he has been drinking all day, that his daughter got married that morning, and that he drank champagne and a few bottles of wine at the reception, and many single malt scotches there-after.Quite upset, the policeman proceeds to breathe test the Englishman and verifies that he is indeed completely hammered.He asks the Englishman if he knows why, under French law, he is going to be arrested.The Englishman answers with a bit of humor, “No sir, I do not! But while we’re asking questions, do you realize that this is a British car and my wife is driving on the other side?This one is compliments of.
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