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But don't even think that we don't notice the ridicule of our classmates. The guys want to fuck us to show us what a real man can do, or either they want to see us getting it on. Most girls hate us and think they are going to catch our illness. Fuck 'em, we are not sick; we are queer. So I say, Fuck you world. Stick it up your ass if you don't like it. There is nothing I can do about it. Except love girls the way God meant me to love girls. Sometimes you must say Fuck off world."It was silent for a few seconds"Yes, you're right," I mumbled, "but not yet. I just can't do that yet." A month ago, did you think you would ever have sex with a girl?" I shook my head. "So, yes you can, at least you'll admit that. Honestly, we'll do anything to help you, as long as you try to help yourself." Would you tell me your stories? That may help me sort it out," I asked, trying to keep from crying."Well, I know the question isn't superfluous, least not for you, but you know it isn't going to solve. Your breasts were surgically implanted and they can be surgically removed. If you can live with out sex, which I find hard to imagine, but every priest in the world is doing it, you can still live a wonderful life." We walked out to the living room, sank into chairs and just talked for the next hour, both of us having another drink or two. Jake finally had to leave and I walked him to the door saying, "Jake, I really appreciated what you have done for me today. Not only meeting me at the police station, but trying to buck me up when I am so down. Jake, I was just going to jump in front of the next car when you came up. You have saved my life and I thank you. Give me a ring in the next week and I will answer the phone. I won't be dead. Ok buddy?" "Ok, and I knew when I saw you at the curb, I had better move fast or it just might be to late. I did and now with a couple of scotches, a little talk and you at least seem rational now. But call anytime if you get real down. .
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