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" I ventured."You may find that a bit difficult." He grinned even wider. "Dressedlike that!" What?!" My delicate eyebrows shot up in surprise. "Where are myclothes?" Carla has them." He poured himself a cup of coffee. "Or maybe Liz orJune... Don't you remember anything at all about last night?"He could see from the look on my face I was too flustered to answer andwent on,"You got a few drinks in you and kept talking about how sexy women lookin dresses, and what a thrill it was, looking like this. You know howsome people keep repeating themselves when they've had a few too many?Well that was you last night. It got so you wouldn't shut up about it.Finally the girls said if you liked it so much they'd see you kept righton looking like a girl!"I couldn't believe what I was hearing, but he kept on talking calmly ashe ate his breakfast."We all went to some kinky boutique in the Bohemian part of town, andthe girls told the staff there to give you the Full Treatment: shots,permanent. Shame is often associated with exposure, and in thatregard it's custom-made for a person, like a handmade garment that'stailored to conceal a hidden truth. A truth that's buried in the dark,like a pearl inside an oyster, waiting to be found.It's this hidden truth that fears discovery which makes shame sodeeply personal, so private and yet so public. Because a secret thatmust be hidden at all costs also yearns for release. The humiliation,the guilt...the pain of keeping the secret is what keeps the shamealive.Of course, it's not an easy thing to live with a secret, and manypeople who carry such an invisible weight will seek out a place wherethey can unburden themselves. A place where they can let their secretout in a safe space, to trustworthy and well-meaning people, free ofjudgment and derision.This was NOT that kind of place.Downtown there's a store, the sort of place that you'd drive by allthe time to which you'd never give a second thought. Oh, you'd noticeit--the ornate pink.
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