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She settled into the couch and I sat across from her in the armchair.“Nate, look, I just need to tell you this, and I need to get it all out. I also need you to promise not to laugh or anything, okay? Can you do that?”“I’m here, and I’m listening. I promise I won’t laugh unless you give me permission, okay?” The smile was forced, and crooked, but at least she smiled.Pausing to swallow, and then stop her hands from fluttering in her lap, Melody sighed and said, “Okay, in one big rush here’s the deal. I’m a virgin. I’ve never so much as touched a boy, or man, and I don’t know what came over me, but I wanted to win the hill race. I wanted it so badly because I want you to make me not be a virgin, and I don’t want an audience or a cheer section. I want it to be gentle and loving and God, I want it in the worst way! There I said it, now you can laugh if you want to!” The last was said fairly defiantly.I crossed the distance to the couch and knelt, so I could look into her downcast eyes.. " How about coming over and pushing my buttons?" I asked, just to be playful. I knew it was impossible."I wish I could but we have to get ready to go back to school. See you Friday?"I told her I was looking forward to Friday night and went back to making journal entries but found it difficult to concentrate. For some time I had been on the verge of telling Cindy I loved her. But something in what she had said made me reconsider. Something that took place a couple of weeks later made me glad I had held my tongue.There had been talk about Spence and Gloria spending a weekend with us, Spence would stay with me and Gloria would stay with the Baldwin sisters. Cindy had mentioned it to me and Spence had mentioned the idea also. He hinted that he and Gloria were fascinated by our description of the cottages. I hadn't told him of our new freedom to use my room on Friday and Saturday nights but he may have heard that from Gloria. Nothing we did together remained a secret at Speedwell.My.
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