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But the worse short term impact would have been on Abby, Cathy, Cindy and Candy. Her constant whine of how this was wrong and we were doing the wrong thing would have started to crack them. And we can't afford that to happen if we are going to keep the lifeboat afloat." Margaret replied"You think she could have done that?" Carol asked."You are the lawyer. Imagine how effective repetitive and constant commentary like that would be here, much less a courtroom?" Margaret asked.Sitting back and thinking on that, Carol saw a bigger game here than she had thought."I hadn't thought about that. You really worried about the details impacting all of us." Darling, not a day or night goes by but when David and I are not worried about how we can keep all of you safe. And from all enemies both foreign and domestic." Margaret said. "This little houseboat is always at risk. We just have to balance them and make sure that they are manageable, while still keeping the boat afloat." I hear you. I guess. But if he’s with a woman and suddenly he can’t get hard, it’s humiliating. Then the next time he’s ready to have sex, the fear that it will happen again causes it to happen. Telling him not to worry, that it really doesn’t matter or that he’s probably just tired or maybe he had too much to drink – or any other soothing excuse by the woman he is with – doesn’t really help because, to him, it really does matter! Actually, the well-meant sympathy probably will add to his humiliation. Once the fear of failure sets in, failure is almost inevitable. Men will even start avoiding being in sexual situations when he will be expected to perform because of that fear. ‘In addition, when a couple wants children and nothing happens, what is normally a very pleasant, exciting experience can become work – the goal being pregnancy, not pleasure. That’s probably was what the specialist meant by saying that you were just trying too hard. The pressure and tension builds up as does the fear of failure..
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