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I know when she's leaving - five. What kind of stupid process is this?" You start with things you know about the subject, and you watch them to learn what doesn't fit the pattern; things that can reveal their secrets." What if she doesn't have any secrets?" Then that's what we'll learn." Can I go home?" No. We'd lose her. Who knows what information we might miss out on?" Yeah. Who knows?" Besides, unless I sit out here hour after boring hour, how am I going to be able to accurately describe what it's like to stake somebody out, to follow them? How else can I find the few moments that might be worth writing about except to experience it? How else could I realize I should have brought a bottle of water than recognize I'm so thirsty it hurts? It might never have occurred to me had I just assumed what it would be like." I share your pain."Outside of the fact that she treated herself to a solo dinner at the Italian Restaurant around the corner from her apartment, I did learn one extremely. There are three of us here, but it seems like Mom and me are one person, the same personality, and Helen is someone completely different." Go on," I said."For as long as I can remember, my mother has not been really happy. I'm not trying to say that she was the depressed, moping person, but she hasn't really had a spark. Helen had that spark. When she wasn't fighting with Mom, she was out having a good time, and she seemed like she was happy most of the time."I don't think that I have that spark, either. I don't have fun like Helen does. I have friends, but no one really close. I looked at my mother and I thought, 'Am I going to be like that when I am her age?' I don't want to go through life just being. I want to be happy."Then, over the last few months, I noticed that Mom has been getting more cheerful. She seemed to have something that she looked forward too. And then in the last week, she has been positively glowing. It's like she has been freed. She is more open, cheerful,.
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