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I think I did a pretty good job, not wearing my disappointment. I still loved the restaurant in general, & the meal for me was still untarnished. I walked down the street to my car, dropping my coat off in the trunk, & getting out the unopened package of cigarettes. Vanilla Dreams, I’d bought them more than a month ago, after stealing my first from a former lover in a near suicidal depression. I wasn’t that bad now, just a little broken & disappointed…. I walked a block or so to a park I’d found earlier, when I was still searching for food. There was the broad expanse of a ball field, & up a hill there were tennis courts & a play ground. I walked around in the park for a little while, alternating between fantasies of a romantic evening that never happened, & becoming increasingly angry at myself for thinking for a moment that I should be deserving of such a night. I finally sat on the steps between the ball field & the tennis courts, opening the flavored cigarettes with a sigh &. ” “You’re some type of seer then…” “In a way yes. Anyway when I saw you over there with Kantar I sensed something I hadn’t felt in a long time. It’s nothing sexual or anything like that. I felt something in your soul that made you shine out from the rest of the girls.” “So what destiny do I have?” “Unlike most you have the will and the power to change your destiny.” “Huh?” “Most people have a set destiny, everything is already laid out and you just follow the trail. You have the power to create your own trail, to venture from the set path.” Anika glances at her not sure what to think. Missy says, “I don’t expect you to believe me just like that…but I felt I needed to at least tell you.” Anika looks at her more closely and says, “He wasn’t your son was he?” Missy goes silent, Anika says, “Lover?” “Does it matter?” “It’s a difference in how you remember him.” Missy looks down as Anika crawls towards the middle of the bed to go to sleep. Missy says, “Anika…?” “Yeah?” Missy turns and.
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