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. the realization that this really was going to happen and would change me forever. That this was going to pass over into reality. It reminded me of the first time I had sex... the feeling that you can't take it back... it really happened - so surreal at the time.My heart was pumping... I was in a daze... it was a weird sensation driving over to his place... like being in a movie, it felt like being in a dream. I was an autopilot, not quite in control and just going through the motions. I kept thinking about his hard cock which kept me going. I arrived at his house and sat in the car for a few minutes... trying to get some composure. I was so nervous... so overwhelmed. I knew I just had to keep going and not think about it... I went to the door and without thinking about it rang the bell. He opened the door and told me to come in - he knew how frightened I'd be and made it easier. He looked a lot different in real life, even though I'd seen pictures and talked to him on the. Real girlsjust scared me to death. It was so much easier for me to put on a pairof my mom's panties and pretend I was a girl. I'm not into boys, thoughwhen I'm dressed, I like to think it would be cool if a guy thought Iwas attractive and might want to demonstrate his affections.I tried on some of my sister's things, and once I was visiting somecousins, I slept in one of their pajama sets. That was the closest I'dever come to getting caught. So I started dressing when there was nochance of getting caught. This is important because closettransvestites really don't want to get caught, but to be accepted sothey don't have to hide it in the closet.I decided I'd run away from the transvestite crap by joining themilitary. I figured there was no way in the world I'd be able to hideanything from the military and it'd make a man out of me. Well, guesswhat, readers. Any cross dressers out there know that it's impossibleto run away from cross dressing. I did well for a while. When I movedto my.
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