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"Jase, come on!" I complained. "I don't fuck with your shit." Damn right you don't or I'd beat the snot out of you," Jason taunted, still evading my hands to keep my mini."JASON! RICHARD! Stop it right now!" Mom yelled and Jason suddenly tossed my miniature right at me, but I was surprised by Mom's yell and failed to catch it and it broke in two as it hit the ground."You broke it you asshat!" I gave Jason a punch to the arm, but of course that was the only thing Mom saw."Richard, you're grounded!" She snapped. I complained and tried to explain, but she had to leave for work and wouldn't hear anything more about it. That's when some of his other college friends drove up and he took off with them laughing how I as the only 'kid' left in the house still got grounded. I was supposed to go out with my friends tonight and play with the new miniatures in our favorite war game, but Jerkface decided to steal one while I was painting them and went and broke it. I'd be able to glue it. The new owner, a firefighter, was no stranger to Anglo Saxon turns of phrase, but, Lawsey! This bird knew some curses!The firefighter tried reasoning with the bird, and, for his trouble, was invited to have carnal knowledge of a goat.He tried yelling at the bird, and was invited to worship at the altar of the Patron Saint of Fertility. With himself.Finally, the bird let loose with a blistering stream of invective, so loud, so profane, so scorching vulgar, that, in desperation, the firefighter seized the parrot, threw open the freezer, and tossed the squalling bird inside, slamming the door shut.The cursing and shenanigans continued for several minutes, until, abruptly, they ended. The man waited for a few more minutes, until, concerned, he peeked into the freezer, and beheld a silent, wide eyes bird scrunched up in one corner of the freezer.He withdrew the silent parrot, set him on his perch, and regarded the creature for a bit.“You think that you have finished swearing around me?”.
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