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“Treat others as you would be treated,” my folks taught me, and that’s served me well enough. In the final days of autumn I bring in the last crops of the year, working most days well past dusk, racing against bad weather. I have to be done not later than the Harvest Moon. Not just for the sake of a good crop, but each year since late puberty the Harvest Moon triggers what I call my inheritance. And then all hell breaks loose. I’m not exactly sure why, but my wife and I have never spoken about the inheritance. For myself, I don’t have real clear memories of what happens, although for weeks afterwards I will have some pretty vivid dreams. The dreams are always about drinking wine and having wild sex with screaming women. I catch my wife checking the Farmer’s Almanac as September advances, but I pretend not to notice. We both know what’s coming. Just prior to the full moon illuminating the chill dusk of October, my wife feeds me a very large porterhouse steak, cooked very rare and. All of us were wearing stockings and suspenders.And bras, of course. The falsies that we dollies had in our bras gave usall larger busts than the girls had. But I couldn't help wishing that Ihad real tits. Even if relatively modest in size.Helen led us through to the sitting room that was part of the bridalsuite. There were three cushions on the floor. She picked up a circulartray. "Take your key necklaces off," she instructed. She took eachnecklace and placed it on the tray. Then she turned the tray round andhanded a necklace back to each of us. "Hopefully no-one has their ownnecklace now," she said. "But now you've each got to give the key back tothe right person." She directed three of us to stand behind a cushionandthe other three to kneel down in front of them. "OK. Now if you'rekneeling down, read the name on the knickers in front of you and sayhello to your partner by name. Then gently pull down his knickers and seeif the key fits his padlock. If it doesn't, pull his knickers.
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