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‘Did you see that bloke get off just then?’ I said, to no one in particular as I looked around the carriage. But they all looked at me like I was barmy. ‘You must have seen him, for Christ’s sake?’ But they just stared. It was like in one of those Hammer House of Horrors things where all the people in the village are in cahoots with each other, or in some sort of sect. They look at you suspiciously, but never speak, because you’re an outsider. Anyway, at Holborn station I got off and took the escalator to ground level. I thought I’d stop off at The Clover Leaf pub before I made my way home. I needed a stiff drink after what I’d been through. I felt for ‘trilby’s’ wallet in my side pocket. It was still there, nice and snug. At least that was real. I would check through it once I’d got myself into a nice little corner with my scotch… might just turn out to be a nice little ‘earner’. When it came to paying for my drink I thought I’d have enough change in my trouser pocket. But you know. I’m not sure I can describe it accurately, but here’s a try. He was the obvious outsider in our group of friends and said little throughout the night, but he never looked ill at ease. Aside from the sporadic pithy jokes he’d shoot into the conversation, all dry and sarcastic and unruffled, he drew little attention to himself. As if that helped detract from his status as the dish of the night. I don’t know why, but I found myself immensely attracted to him. Okay maybe I know exactly why – I’m a huge sucker for those introverted geek types with a secretly witty interior. The types that were the nerds back in high school and eventually grew into themselves over time. Their prolonged isolation enriched their individuality. These men could be weird as coconut sherbet and it didn’t bother them the slightest bit. Confidence and self-assuredness like that, I found fucking attractive. Correction, present tense. I find, and I always will. I spent most of the night feeling like my high school.
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