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I sometimes wished that he did as I'd often wondered what hisresponse would be. I thought that he would probably me one of my very fewfriends to accept me. He'd been there for me so much since school. He'dbeen my friend through the endless bullying I suffered when I started outat my secondary school and been there when I lost Louise. But I was a coward."What makes you say that?" I asked trying to regain focus on the present."Because, Mike", Eddie Bright said, being one of the few people I'd allowto call me Mike, "if you follow your dreams you'll be happy. Actually thetruth is that if you don't follow your dreams you won't be happy. Whateverthe fuck happens when you follow your dreams... mate even if it goes wrongat least you know you've tried" So," I tried to interrupt, which was like trying to stop a freight trainwith a water pistol."Listen Mike. I got Melissa to sleep with me because I went for it. Icould have sat around that bar wondering whether she was as fuckinggorgeous. Melanie, do you remember when Spirit landed, the night we got back together?" Of course! I'll never forget that night." Neither will I. Do you remember how you asked me to trust you so much, that all my fears would go away?"Melanie stared at me for a moment, and then nodded."I'm asking the same thing in return. Melanie, trust me. What were you afraid of?"My wife gulped. I had never seen her look so shy... no, not shy, embarrassed. "Melanie #2 came back," she whispered, "I didn't know she still existed. Oh Eric, I was so afraid..."I reached over and hugged her. We rocked together for a while, not saying anything."Melanie #2 Eric... It wasn't just in high school. I was doing it all my childhood, as far back as I can remember... and I never told you... I never trusted you... Oh Eric! I'm so ashamed!"I kissed her. "Melanie, true Melanie, there is no shame. Trust me now?"She nodded. "Okay." But before, what were you ashamed of?" Ashamed of being weak, ashamed of my lack of courage... I.
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