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She had such a sexy look, and her eyes were bluer than I remember!It dawned on me after looking at these photos that they were taken by a third party. Suddenly I was intrigued by who else could have been in on this. Was it Jan? She really wasn't one to keep a secret, and to be honest, looking at the quality of these pictures, I figured they must have been taken by a professional photographer.I immediately called Jan and asked her a few vague questions about leaving something on my doorstep. She said she knew nothing about it, and seemed to be convincing. She was curious about what I found, and I finally confessed that I received some reveailing photos of our new neighbors. Now Jan was more excited than me. She begged me to let her see them, and said she'd be right over.My nosy blonde friend hung up before I could tell her no, and left me sitting there staring at my phone. Jan showed up in less than a minute. I swear she sprinted over here. She cozied up next to me and pried to see. I want you to shut them down.”“What coffee houses?”Mathilda Gruff’s sigh left little to my imagination. In her mind, I was undoubtedly the stupidest man she’d ever met, or at least, I was the stupidest man she’d met in the last ten minutes. “I want you to shut them down,” she said. “I want you to shut down the thong girl coffee houses.”There was an obvious question and since it was an obvious question and since I’m a reporter who is paid to ask the obvious questions, I asked it. “What’s a thong girl coffee house?”Mathilda Gruff looked at me as if I was so stupid and she gave me another one of her sighs before she finally answered. “The girls in the coffee shops are wearing thongs and ... and other things. Revealling things. Disgusting things designed to tittilate the customers.”I wasn’t sure if that, exactly, was what Mathilda had in mind but she certainly had my interest. “Tittilate the customers,” I asked. “Which coffee shop did.
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