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I looked up as the door opened and then immediately turned my head as I found myself looking at the naked back of a distressed girl. She was covering her face with her hands and crying. I looked over at the chair sitting next to the bed and seeing a robe hanging over the back, picked it up and used it to cover Wendy.I was going to put my arms around her when I suddenly had a desperate urge, to rip the robe off of Wendy and show her something other than tenderness. A huge part of me was completely appalled by the thought and I summoned my willpower to tame my rising libido. The feeling subsided a little, but persisted even as I tried to get Wendy to calm. I was putting my arm around her while a titanic struggle between my honor and my lust warred within me. I could not understand the feeling, or its intensity, but I finally beat it down enough to take a breath and speak."Wendy. Wendy! Look up. Look at me," I said as she continued to sob into her hands. The crying had slowed, and then. .. As muchas I enjoyed it, it just hammered home that I'm still pre-op. Jamie saysshe doesn't mind, but she's only been with REAL men before... We're goodfriends, GREAT friends, and I know that if we weren't close, she'd neverhave agreed to be with me..." Remember that I know Jamie very well," Beverly says with a smile. "Ifher feelings for you are genuine, SRS shouldn't make a difference." But it'd make a difference to MY feelings for ME," I sigh. "Myrelationship with Jamie... I LOVE her, but I'm afraid that every timewe're together... I'll always have this nagging thought in the back of mymind, that she's had SRS and I haven't, that I should..." Jamie shouldn't be your only reason for having SRS," Beverly advises."It sounds like your feelings for her have been growing for some timenow, am I right?" Yeah," I sigh. "And yes, my desire to have SRS have grown alongside myfeelings for Jamie. I know how it must sound- yes, I've been pre-op foreight years, it may seem like these feelings.
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