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To supporteach other. They already do. All they need is to get rid of the oceanbetween them.Julie stood in the door to her bathroom. Tears in her eyes. One footalready in the bathroom. Eyeing the cabinet with the razorblades. Andwith first aid paraphilia. The urge to cut grew stronger. Also the urgeto cut deeper. To bleed more. Maybe she should slice her arm open. Orboth arms. And then watch it bleed till she faints. Maybe together withJulie.If they can't be in love and together in this life. Maybe in anotherlife. They'll find each other again. Maybe Ramona should go alone. Shecould watch over Julie, make sure she's alright, keep trouble and otherthings away from her. Make sure she'll be happy. She wasn't sure. Shemoved away from her cabinet just to break down crying. She curled on thefloor crying for hours.But what else could Julie do? Travel bans are in place. Both ways. Noidea when any of them will be lifted. A pandemic ruling the world,getting more and more aggressive and fucking. Later that evening a friend of AliceBoyfriend showed up. I met him a few times already. Always pre-transition. And I don't think he recognized me. It felt good.A week later it was time to go back to Vienna again. It was kind ofpainful as I really felt happy back at home and I wanted to move back.Being in Vienna for two and a half years now, I also felt that themission I originally had was accomplished. I mean I wanted to moveaway to finally dare to do what I had to do. And I went and did it. Ilived full time as a female. More so, I started to think less and lessabout it. Life started to become normal.Two more things, one almost accomplished, and the other needed to besorted out as well.Number one was the name change. Which was currently out of my hands. Iwaited for the last statement which would be ready to pick up at thepractice two days after returning from Germany. And with that, I hadmy paperwork in order. Apart from the two statements I needed like adiary. Just a letter from.
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