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. then left. God, she realized, he could have had her. He said he could wait until she no longer felt guilty. If that's all she had to do, pretend to feel guilty whenever he made advances... that was easy! It was easy if she could make herself not want him! Otherwise, she would hide her guilt. She might not even feel it, making it even easier for her awakened body to run away with her principles! She must not let that happen! She just mustn't!But the petite little blond knew that her feelings were a turmoil. Captain Happy, making his advances and cutting himself off, was respecting her more than Douglas ever had. Douglas had respected her virginity before they were married. He had even respected it afterwards! He had valued her virginity more than he had valued her! Now that she had lost it, he had lost interest. He had become cool and correct. Having nothing to believe in, he believed in her coolness and correctness. She actually found herself yearning to tell her principled husband. He made a very sarcastic cross in the air over her forehead as he intoned, "De re responsibility, te absolvo in nomine Patri, et Filii, et Spiritu Sancti. Sicut erat in principio, et nunc, et semper, et in saecula saeculorum. Amen."I absolve you of responsibility in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. As it was in the beginning, is now and ever shall be, world without end. Amen. Jenna flinched visibly. Sometimes her husband's vast intelligence made it very difficult to make a point with him. And when he hit, he hit hard and in places calculated to hurt. He was no fun to fight with, not at all."That was a cheap shot," she said, fighting tears.His tone softened, already regretting hurting her. He never meant to. "But it's true, Jen. You always put the decision back on me. It's always got to be my idea or my plan or my suggestion. You never take responsibility for anything that happens in this relationship." Because everything I try to do winds up being a disaster," she said.
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