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” Mother added.“So?” I sighed.“And worth half a million pounds.” “Bloody hell!” I gasped, why I could pay my bill at the whore house, pay my gambling debts and buy myself out of the damned army.“But as you are twenty nine already dear Aunt Delilah has taken it upon herself to find you a bride and she has chosen her great friend Gertrude’s daughter, Lucinda,” Mother continued.“Her!, dear god, she’s a servant of Lesbos, she would no sooner take me than an elephant!” I exclaimed.“A half million is a great aphrodisiac,” she pointed out, “And you will be free to chase whores till your hearts content.”“But Mother, she consorts with other women carnally!” I gasped.“As does Aunt Delilah,” Mother pointed out.“Ah, a marriage for appearances,” I declared.“But of course Geoffrey,” Mother continued, “No one woman could conceivably absorb your passion, no if you two marry I dare say she will frighten every serving maid witless while you waste all your money on whores, rather like your poor. Then mum suddenly said, in a much less stern voice, "Well, let's have acloser look at you, and see if you have indeed got your seamsstraight!"All five of them then started laughing, and I realised they were all inon the joke, and getting me into a girdle and nylons was a set-up rightfrom the start. I was so relieved; I joined in with their laughing. Mumhad a bag with her, and opened it up to reveal the same pair of blackcourt shoes with 3" heels that I'd "borrowed" from her cupboard lastyear for my schoolgirl dress up with Geraldine and Wendy."Well," said mum, "you'd better put these on again, or you'll besnagging those new nylons of yours, walking around barefooted."So, I slipped them on as ordered, and found they were still as asuncomfortable to walk in as last year, but maybe I'd been picking upsome pointers from Doris without realising, on how to walk " properly"in high heels, because when I walked around the office they allapplauded at my efforts.Then finally Doris said, "Dave,.
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